Comments: "Recorded live at the Jon Lovitz Podcast Theater, 12/01/2012...."
Recorded Sat, 15th Dec. 2012
Released Mon, 17th Dec. 2012
0:00 SModCo ads.
7:26 Intro by Kyle Hebert.
8:20 Ralph and Kevin address the recent tragedy in Newtown, CT. HBO listener Chris Kelly sends in an email.
10:05 Shout-outs: Burke tries to get Tori and Tyler laid, via Christian Bale.
11:45 Amber from Newcastle, Australia sends in Ralph's favorite email, ever. Struggles with an anal sex drought. Australian men questioned. Lucas, Ethan and Dan told to go fuck themselves by Sean Connery. Mom present. Bond-puns.
16:25 Chris and Crystal enjoy a night out before trying for kids. Bowie photo. DJ James puts them under the spotlight.
16:40 Quote: "First sentence done, nothing about anal ... boring!"
19:55 Email bag: Ralph plugs @HBOHelper.
20:50 Quote: "This is another guy not getting anal."
21:20 Mark Jones sends in Rapey Clown.
21:50 Quote: "It's time to make a baby ..."
22:00 Jesse from Northfield, Minnesota asks for Ed Wynn's Baby's Got Back.
22:55 Mike in Vermont played Anne Heche's Butthole for his wife. Dan Louisell plugged.
24:00 Ralph Garman: The Moses of Anal.
23:30 Quote: "Chocolate Tunnel of Love."
24:30 Hayley Hetfield sends in The Gay Ghostbusters. Kevin chides Ralph for not chiming in with Travolta.
25:40 Seth McPizza sends in Kevin's "It's not gay if ..." list.
27:20 Quote: "Put the blowhole in the gravestone."
27:50 Gooper referenced. Kevin saw Looper, finally. Gooper hypothesized.
31:00 Creepy Clown Time: Chris Short asks for the Elmo Creepy Clown. The Rapey Clown discussed again.
33:40 Tinseltown Stiffs: Ravi Shankar. রবি শংকর- রাগঃ রসিয়া. (The Afterlife pondered, and discussed a little. Ralph is agnostic, and Kevin's idea of Heaven is Gooper). Kevin is told he can't smoke on-stage.
38:25 Hollywood Helpers: Charlie Sheen donates to Lindsay Lohan and a child cancer patient. Ralph in NYC tomorrow to promote Season 3 of The Joe Schmo Show. Past season recaps. Ralph rocks his British accent, and hates a hawk. Joe Schmo clip. Ralph will see Glengarry Glen Ross featuring Al Pacino.
44:15 Hollywood Helper: Shannen Doherty. Mewes digs Charmed. Ralph describes his experiences on Charmed. Ralph not a fan of Rose McGowan. Dispatcher mocked as the tape is played. DJ James with a well-placed shotgun.
50:00 Exquisite Acting: Kylie Mason from Amarillo, TX sends in Liz and Dick.
51:40 Shit That Should Not Be: Goldfinger. Daniel Bryant saluted.
53:20 Quote: "I don'''t have a licence to count."
53:45 Kev-In: The SuperHero Edition. Wolverine. Iron Man. Bat-Bong.
55:20 HBO Headlines: New Years Eve show plugged, and the 2013 Chelsea Award.
56:20 Lindsay Lohan no-shows in court. Finally snagged the singer of The Wanted. Kevin confused by the longevity of the process. Bank accounts seized by the IRS. Begging for cash from friends. Storage locker in $16,000 arrears. Scores Strip Club offers to pay the bill for a Lohan web-chat. Future discussed.
1:02:00 Carly Rae Jepsom nude photos hacked. Ralph took some polaroids in the past. Call Me Maybe.
1:04:30 Quote: "I don't give a fuck, I wanna see her naked!"
1:05:45 Tadolf Switler stalker arrested at her property. Kevin fight's loneliness.
1:07:50 Justin Bieber murder plot. "Paisley tie," "Ken doll." DJ James shows a picture of the plot.
1:10:00 Grease puns. John Travolta and Olivia Newton-John I think You Might Like It. Hair discussed; Chia-John.
1:12:12 Anne Hathaway getting out of the limo. Zoom, zoom, zoom. Ralph breaks down the uses of the vagina.
1:14:00 Victoria's Secret: I'm dumb as a box of hair. "You skinny cunt! Merry Christmas."
1:16:25 Fourth guy files lawsuit against Elmo.
1:17:40 Ralph annoys everyone with Gangnam Style. Psy had a song called Dear American, an anti-American song, from some time ago. Signs a $30m record deal.
1:19:00 Jackie Chan would to be Baron Von Trappe in The Sound of Music. "Cripsy rice, crispy rice."
1:20:00 Tom Hanks to make his Broadway debut with Peter Scolari.
1:21:00 Movies That Will Suck: Kristin Stewart in a con artist comedy with Ben Affleck. Ralph questions Affleck's talents. Kevin makes some suggestions, Surviving Christmas. Denzel Washington in The Equalizer. Edward Woodward. Top Gun IMAX 3D going into theaters. Ralph says it does not hold up. Blatant homo-eroticism discussed.
1:25:15 Lincoln is much-lauded. Kevin enjoyed. "It's just like Lincoln!" James Taylor was once penciled in to be Lincoln.
1:27:35 Megan Fox to stop being sexy. She's a mom. Megan Fox. Sorry! Linda Carter discussed.
1:29:30 Geek News: The Lone Ranger trailer released.
1:31:05 Tron 3 announced.
1:31:45 Superman trailer released. Pa Kent a dick. Kunt Olgart's Turkish Superman.
1:36:40 Liam Neeson's Cock jokes.